WTF?

WTF!? Have you ever wondered WHY things are happening in your life and that if they keep happening the way they’re going, you might blow a gasket?

My life as I knew it is no longer… Tonight I write to you from a hotel room at the Holiday Inn in Auburn, California.  After the last couple weeks, I just wanted to get HOME.

Have you ever wondered why things happen that challenge you? This is totally where I am tonight. I recently lost a friend on Thanksgiving to cancer. She was too young, and it hit hard-home with me. She remained brave and positive through her entire fight with Cancer (the beast). I really believed and prayed that she would beat the beast! I believe she thought the same. But on Thanksgiving, she lost her battle.

I had already lost my BEST friend of 32 years to the beast, and this one was icing on the cake! When I first heard of my Best friend’s cancer, I was devastated. I never cried so hard in my entire life. I was going through a divorce and an UGLY one at that! I never felt so alone. I was living in Reno, Nevada and didn’t have any “friends” outside of work except for her.  My divorce was stressful both emotionally and financially.  But most important of all…I had a beautiful son who was now being bounced back and forth between me and my ex husband.

I was the assistant manager for Trader Joe’s, whom I’ve worked for almost 18 years. Retail hours, along with my commute had me working almost 60 hours a week! Weekends and Holidays off were not even up for debate. I adore Trader Joe’s company. They are my family and my bread and butter.  Some of my closest friends have come out of this company! …However, I needed, wanted and longed for “something more”.  I would drive to work stressed and worried about how I would finance my divorce, pay my ex-husband (leach) off and still be able to give 100% of my time and attention to my son when I had him.

SKIP AHEAD ONE YEAR:

After my divorce and after my best friend lost her battle with the Beast, I changed the way I looked at life. I had managed to pay my ex off and $40,000 later, I was FREE AT LAST! I had started my own business with Arbonne, a Health and Wellness company and just four months after doing so was making enough money every month to step down from management and have more time with my main squeeze, my son.

My business, along with the MOST amazing team of women started to flourish! My team consisted of strong women! A Major in the Air Force and commercial pilot (mother of four!), a manager of a Beer Distributor and reinvented woman, and a Deputy Sheriff, former single momma and Cross Fit guru! All these women who I love and adore, are the products of a bigger vision and a brave group who basically asked themselves, “Why Not?” instead of “Why?”

I recently drove through a snow storm to launch one of these woman’s newest consultant.  This is ironic, because tonight, I was driving home from my aunt’s house and just wanted to “get home”…the summit over hwy 80 turned me around because  I wasn’t carrying chains.  I wasn’t carrying chains because I was driving a rental car, due to my car was in the shop due to “issues”.

Here’s where it gets good: (and by good I mean, where you will be like, “WTF!?”)

So on Thanksgiving, I lost my friend to the BEAST. I was already worried about my step mom and my Dad’s health (he has prostate cancer), then right before Christmas, my Grandmother passed away. (my mom’s mom) and then over Christmas my step dad stroked twice! He went into surgery and came out safely (thank God!). The same day he came out of surgery, my aunt called to tell me that my favorite uncle passed from ALS. I requested the time off from “work”. I drove to be with my aunt, but needed a rental car (because my mommy missel car needed love), so my car left behind I jumped behind the wheel of a 2016 Toyota Camry and DROVE….. While at my aunt’s house I did whatever I could to serve her and help her through this difficult time! I gave my time up with my son, because there is a TIME and PLACE for everything and everyone. (but i missed the crap out of him!!)

At dinner tonight, I friended an amazingly strong woman. She is a lawyer and a step mother of four. She and I talked extensively and by the end of our talk, business cards were exchanged. I drove to get gas, so I’d be ready for tomorrow’s drive and I backed into the owner of the gas station’s car.  My rental car was alright, but his was not.  WTF!? This is laughable now, right? I mean if you focus on the negative, you just cry.

I had to reschedule MY doctor appointment three times due to unforeseen circumstances with my family.  All this and I got bad news from my doctor recently about an abnormal PAP. I got bad news.

I am a strong woman. I am a loving mother and daughter (niece and grand-daughter). I am a great friend and coach. I am a loyal and hard working employee. I am me. I don’t know why God or the Universe is passing these challenges along to me, but I DO KNOW THAT IT’S NOT ANYTHING I CAN’T HANDLE. I am where I am at because this is exactly where He wants me to be. I have a choice to be sad, scared, doubtful and down or the option to be Positive, Fearless and Optimistic. I choose the second. period.

I love my life and all the quirkiness!